Hey guys,
my name is Melody and I’m a Pastor’s kid.
This piece is to all the Pastors’ kids’ out there. Those who’ve
been bound by bizarre unspoken rules all their life.
“And they’re
pastor’s children.”
How
many times did I hear this phrase while growing up?
You sneeze awkwardly and everyone looks in your direction
saying to themselves with a smirk on their face: “And she’s a Pastor’s child…Humph!”
And I’m
like what? So I can’t sneeze again?
The same people would do worse things and justify themselves
sweetly.
As I
grew up, I got to discover some of the crazy things expected from Pastors’ kids…(feel
free to add yours.)
- Thou shall not come late to church for any reason (even if you have
the perfect excuse of say, traffic, rain etc.)
-Thou shall not look good. You know Pastor’s kids are actually expected
to be the poorest looking in church? Dress good and you’ve started backsliding.
Ha!
-Thou shall not, for any reason be caught talking to the opposite sex.
-Thou shall be perfect in morals.
-Thou shall not make mistakes of any kind (at least in public.)
-Thou shall be in every church department possible.
-Thou shall not miss any church service for any reason…even if you’re
sick.
-Thou shall always be sober.
So, these are a few I can remember. Preposterous right?
Indeed! Come on! Aren’t Pastors’ kids human too? Don’t they deserve to have a
life without this label? Personally, I wish there was some price that came with
being a Pastor’s kid…you know; a large mouth-watering sum of money that will
make us live the stereotyped lives you want.
So much is expected from Pastors’ kids while so little is given. There’s more
to us than just that. We are actual people who more often than not, love the
same things you love. Why can’t you let us live our lives for ourselves? Why do
we always have to look over our shoulders expecting a reprimand?
Guess
what? You cry, we cry. You laugh, we laugh. You fall in love, we do the same too.
You make mistakes and so do we. You aren’t perfect…yet…and neither are we.
Most
times these bizarre rules are what makes Pastors’ kids turn out to be hell
raisers and rebellious. They’ve lived their life according to the dictates of
others; what the church would like and what not. What would the members say if
they see you doing this or that?
Why do
you keep looking out for our weaknesses? Our failings?
“Did you see how Pastor’s daughter was dancing today in church? Hian! She
was just shaking everything! I wonder oo! These Pastor’s children of nowadays.
Only God knows where she learned that one from!”
“Did you see Pastor’s first son talking to Bro. Ola’s daughter? In
church! And he’s a Pastor’s child!”
“Yesterday I saw Pastor’s daughter close to that club. I don’t even
know what a Pastor’s child was doing in that area sef. Oh!”
“After church today Pastor’s son just left church without greeting
anybody. That boy is a case ooh! I’m sure Pastor is tired of him sef. Only God
will help us in training all these children.”
These
and many more are the conversations that ensue among church members. C’mon
guys! Get a life!
Live
your life and stop looking out for the failings of the Pastors’ kids. For
crying out loud, they’re human beings too! And they like to look good! And yes,
they intend to get married someday so pardon them if they’re talking to the
opposite sex in church…what do you expect? That they do it elsewhere?
And
sometimes the talk isn’t necessarily what you think…sometimes it’s just
innocent talk. Just two friends having a friendly chat Abi, we aren’t allowed
to have friends again?
Don’t
set us on a pedestal we are not.
Here’s what these rules do…they keep us in
check. We learn to live a near perfect life…in public. (Is that good?) Because
no one knows what we do behind closed doors.
My
simple advice to all Pastor’s kids out there…don’t live your life for any human.
Live for God. Because God is everywhere…in those public
places, and in the secret too. He’s watching and he knows you better than these
people ever will.
He
cares for you more than they ever will and the good news is, he isn’t looking for
your weaknesses…he’s building on those strengths. He sees you for who you are
and not what you’re labelled with.
And I think
that’s way better.
There
really isn’t any difference between Pastor’s kids and other kids…except, well…their
parents are Pastors.
So, let
me re-introduce myself: Hi; my name is Melody and I’m human. Like you.
