THOU SHALL NOT - THE PASTOR'S KID

                Hey guys, my name is Melody and I’m a Pastor’s kid.

This piece is to all the Pastors’ kids’ out there. Those who’ve been bound by bizarre unspoken rules all their life.

                “And they’re pastor’s children.”

                How many times did I hear this phrase while growing up?

You sneeze awkwardly and everyone looks in your direction saying to themselves with a smirk on their face: “And she’s a Pastor’s child…Humph!”

                And I’m like what? So I can’t sneeze again?

The same people would do worse things and justify themselves sweetly.

                As I grew up, I got to discover some of the crazy things expected from Pastors’ kids…(feel free to add yours.)

- Thou shall not come late to church for any reason (even if you have the perfect excuse of say, traffic, rain etc.)

-Thou shall not look good. You know Pastor’s kids are actually expected to be the poorest looking in church? Dress good and you’ve started backsliding. Ha!

-Thou shall not, for any reason be caught talking to the opposite sex.

-Thou shall be perfect in morals.

-Thou shall not make mistakes of any kind (at least in public.)

-Thou shall be in every church department possible.

-Thou shall not miss any church service for any reason…even if you’re sick.

-Thou shall always be sober.

So, these are a few I can remember. Preposterous right? Indeed! Come on! Aren’t Pastors’ kids human too? Don’t they deserve to have a life without this label? Personally, I wish there was some price that came with being a Pastor’s kid…you know; a large mouth-watering sum of money that will make us live the stereotyped lives you want.

                 So much is expected from Pastors’  kids while so little is given. There’s more to us than just that. We are actual people who more often than not, love the same things you love. Why can’t you let us live our lives for ourselves? Why do we always have to look over our shoulders expecting a reprimand?

                Guess what? You cry, we cry. You laugh, we laugh. You fall in love, we do the same too. You make mistakes and so do we. You aren’t perfect…yet…and neither are we.

                Most times these bizarre rules are what makes Pastors’ kids turn out to be hell raisers and rebellious. They’ve lived their life according to the dictates of others; what the church would like and what not. What would the members say if they see you doing this or that?

                Why do you keep looking out for our weaknesses? Our failings?

“Did you see how Pastor’s daughter was dancing today in church? Hian! She was just shaking everything! I wonder oo! These Pastor’s children of nowadays. Only God knows where she learned that one from!”

“Did you see Pastor’s first son talking to Bro. Ola’s daughter? In church! And he’s a Pastor’s child!”

“Yesterday I saw Pastor’s daughter close to that club. I don’t even know what a Pastor’s child was doing in that area sef. Oh!”

“After church today Pastor’s son just left church without greeting anybody. That boy is a case ooh! I’m sure Pastor is tired of him sef. Only God will help us in training all these children.”

                These and many more are the conversations that ensue among church members. C’mon guys! Get a life!

                Live your life and stop looking out for the failings of the Pastors’ kids. For crying out loud, they’re human beings too! And they like to look good! And yes, they intend to get married someday so pardon them if they’re talking to the opposite sex in church…what do you expect? That they do it elsewhere?

                And sometimes the talk isn’t necessarily what you think…sometimes it’s just innocent talk. Just two friends having a friendly chat Abi, we aren’t allowed to have friends again?

                Don’t set us on a pedestal we are not.

                 Here’s what these rules do…they keep us in check. We learn to live a near perfect life…in public. (Is that good?) Because no one knows what we do behind closed doors.

                My simple advice to all Pastor’s kids out there…don’t live your life for any human.

Live for God. Because God is everywhere…in those public places, and in the secret too. He’s watching and he knows you better than these people ever will.

                He cares for you more than they ever will and the good news is, he isn’t looking for your weaknesses…he’s building on those strengths. He sees you for who you are and not what you’re labelled with.

                And I think that’s way better.

                There really isn’t any difference between Pastor’s kids and other kids…except, well…their parents are Pastors.

                So, let me re-introduce myself: Hi; my name is Melody and I’m human. Like you.